Can My Heart Mend?
by Crazycraker
Summary: After Dimitri says, "Love fades. Mine has." Dimitri has convinced himself that he doesn't love Rose. Heartache is strong for them both, mourning for their losses. Rose is a mess. Who will be there to comfort her? Who will be her savior?
1. Chapter 1

"_Love fades. Mine has."_

My eyes were dead. My mind was blank. My heart was crushed. And Dimitri didn't care. I lay silently in my room, or, at least, I thought it was my room. I hadn't taken the time to look. Sometimes I hear the faint call of my friends yelling for me to open the door, but their voices sound like a mere whisper. Lissa has sent me many messages through the bond too. They're both easily ignored. Instead, I'm curled into a tight ball on the ground. Here, is the closest thing I feel to safe. If I don't see anyone, I can't get hurt anymore. Dimitri can't hurt me.

Dimitri…

With that name, I started crying again, into the pool of dry tears that have already fallen. I grabbed at my chest, right where my heart should be. But, instead, I felt nothing but a hole. When _he _had said those four words to me, he had ripped my out heart and had taken it with him. No matter how hard I'd tried, he would never love me anymore. His mind was made up. There was no changing it. My tears were falling harder. Faster. I couldn't help it. The one whom I was made for didn't love me. I wasn't mad anymore. I was just in anguish at the decision he had made.

I didn't really pay attention to the fact that someone had just rammed my door open. I didn't pay attention to the fact that that person was carrying me out of the room. I didn't pay attention to the fact that people were staring, or that I hadn't eaten or changed clothes or showered or anything since that night. How long had that been? A week? Two? That wouldn't be possible. The human body can't survive more then about 6 or 7 days without water. I hadn't gotten up since I first went into my room. Even if, it felt like I had been there for an eternity.

I was set down somewhere. It was a white, light room. The instant colors blinded me, for my room was a dark hideout. Something jabbed into my arm. It was a little pinch in the inside of my elbow. The pain was nothing compared to the hole in my chest. Tears will still falling down. I was choked with sobs. The worst part was I knew that people were surrounding me. There were many of them. It was pathetic for them to see me like this. But I saw them as just another monster that would only hurt me yet again.

I felt another pinch, just below my shoulder, and then I got something I hadn't had in a long time. Sleep.

And even then, I was not at peace.

When my dream came to life, I saw I was still in a ball. But I was on the top of a building. New York, I thought to myself. That's where I was.

"My little Dhamphir." A voice said to me. I didn't have to look at him. I knew it was Adrian. I heard him slowly approach me, as if not to scare me off. He lay down on the ground beside me. I didn't bother to reply back. I knew that I couldn't. I loved him too. There was no use to try to make things okay. They clearly weren't. I looked over at him. There was a deep concern in his emerald eyes. One I couldn't describe. It made me even sadder. I was hurting the ones that loved me. I started crying again.

He pulled me into a big hug. He didn't say anything else. He didn't need to. He knew what I needed. I needed someone that would let me cry in peace. And that's just what he gave me. I cried and cried. His warm hand stroked my hair. I didn't know if I could ever love someone again. But, I cared about this person lying beside me. He was what I needed right now. And he would always be here. After what only seemed like only minutes, I squeezed his shoulder. He knew it was time for me to go back.

"Thank you." I whispered in a crackly voice. He nodded once, slowly, as my vision blurred. I was coming back to reality.

Feeling a little better, I opened my eyes. Lissa was there. So were Christian and Mia. Adrian was there too. I smiled a very faint smile at him. Again, he nodded. I was so thankful that he was here for me. And he knew it.

"Hey," Lissa whispered. She was holding my hand. "How are you feeling?"

_Terrible. Horrible. In pain. Like my world is gone._

"We're not going to bombard you with questions, but we want you to know whatever happened, we're here for you. You're going to be okay." I knew that was a lie. She didn't know if that was true or not. But she was trying. Again, I was hurting these wonderful people. I cried again. This time, they were silent tears. They were more controlled. But they were still there. She noticed them. "What did I say honey?" She asked me. But I couldn't speak.

"I think she needs her space right now." Adrian said. Lissa shook her head. I'm not leaving her like this. In fact, do you guys mind giving her and me some alone time? I want to figure this out." They all left, but not until after they squeezed my foot. When they left, she tuned back to me.

"Do you want to talk?" She asked. "Because I know something's not right. You locked yourself in your room for 10 days. It's no wonder you didn't die. If you need to talk, I'm here. I… I know that I sometimes I feel better if I talk to someone. That someone is usually you. I'm ready to hear what you have to say."

"It- It hurts." I whispered. It was barely audible.

"What hurts, Rose?" I grabbed my chest.

"He doesn't love me." I hiccupped. "Not even a little."

She sighed. "I'm so sorry Rose." She didn't know what to do. There was confusion in her words. Then, as if shocked, she stiffened.

"Go away." She said sharply. "She doesn't want to see you. You've caused her enough pain." And then I knew who was beside her.

"Please, Roza."


	2. Chapter 2

Dimitri stepped forward and it took all of my willpower to keep myself collected. I was going to stay strong for Lissa's sake, Dimitri's sake, and for my sake. Dimitri didn't need to know how much he had hurt me, even though it probably showed in my face. I didn't need to prove that I was miserable. If he didn't want to be a part of my life, I wasn't going to keep begging.

"I said she doesn't want to see you" Lissa growled. "Go away. You've done enough damage." She gave him a murderous look of pure hatred. I definitely felt what I saw in the bond. No matter what they had been through in the past, this feeling was an unforgivable feeling.

"It's okay," I mumbled. "I'll talk to him. I don't mind. Honest. But so you think we could do it alone? There are some things better left unknown to you right now." She didn't look happy. In fact, she looked exactly the opposite, but she nodded and slowly walked away. Before she was totally out of site, she looked back at me and said through the bond, _I'll be right out the door if you need me. Please don't push your limits._ I nodded in understanding. I didn't even want to push my limits, as I so often did in the past. I was ready to be good for a little while..

I turned to Dimitri. "What do you want?" I asked. He fidgeted with his fingernails. When he looked up, I saw no emotion in his beautiful, Russian face. His soft, pink lips pursed into a tight line. His body seemed confident, but his eyes showed fear. At least, that's what I thought. I had never seen fear in Dimitri. Besides, what did he have to fear? Me? Certainly not. I was in the hospital due to starvation and extreme dehydration. I couldn't put up a fight. He would take me down in seconds.

"Um… How are you, Rose?" He asked.

"Fine," I replied coldly. He winced, but recollected himself quickly. So he _was_ scared of me! But why? What could I have possibly done to him? He was kick ass god Dimitri; able to take down five Strigoi, become one, and even turn back into a dhamphir all in one piece. Over the loud buzz of the emergency room staff and my thoughts, I almost didn't hear Dimitri say "I'm sorry," before he quickly walked away.

Almost as soon as he was gone, I heard Lissa trying to make her way through all of the people in the open room. Why were there so many people here? Why hadn't I noticed them before? I scanned the room and when I did, I was horrified. One person, a young boy, at least I thought it was a boy, had half of his face mauled off. Another person had a bloody piece of meat for an arm, and the worst of all, I saw someone motionless on a table without a stomach. You could see their ribcage out in the open. I was afraid to know if they were dead or not. Lissa ran up to me, hitting her knee on my bed. Panic filled my lungs as she said to me, "There's been a Strigoi attack."

Anxiety, fear and anger hit me like a train. How could there be a Strigoi attack? What happened? Did anyone live? Why the hell did Dimitri not tell me? He had to have known. I was preoccupied with these questions that I didn't even realize that I was already out the hospital doors. When I looked back, I saw that they had already filled my bed with a person missing a hand and leg. I was happy to know that they got a bed to lay on. I saw some other people on cots.

"Where are you going?" Lissa asked, taking long strides to keep up with me.

"To see if I know anyone that's died."


End file.
